Friday, September 08, 2006

if love were easy it wouldn't be love...



after talking with a dear friend who needed advice on relationships i made myself think...
how did i come upon this wealth of knowledge?
is it from the divorces i have lived through and around?
why do i feel like an expert?
just because i took some relationship classes in college? that doesn't make me an expert...maybe a little smarter than the average person, but no expert.
am i fooling myself?

then it came spilling out of my swiftly typing fingers:

"spending the rest of your life with someone is as scary as hell. we can't deal with ourselves half of the time, how in the world can we live with someone else forever? but, someday you will just look at him and think-how can i not live the rest of my life with this man? no one else will compare to him. no matter how new or exciting someone else is-you know in the back of your mind that they wont treat you as well as he has treated you. times change people-it is inevitable. but the way you treat each other is a choice. if love was easy, it wouldn't be love, would it?"

then i thought- it's true.

when it is meant to be- you will find him.
the one you have prayed that would wait for you.
the one you made lists about before you even knew them.
the one who can look into your eyes and see through your layers of make-up and still love you.
the one will wait for you at the end of the aisle and smile.
because you will be his wife.
you will always be his lady-but being his wife makes you his permanent lady.
noon else can have you.
and if that scares you- then you shouldn't be.

but i'm not scared.
it is the one thing i have been counting down to since the day i decided to pray for my future husband.
i made a list of things that he would be and love to do when i was in high school this is what it said:

gentle and kind
love to play
have happy meal picnics
dance in the rain
snuggle bunny
sing and play me music
be as pure as i am
funny
smart
warrior
love kids
love jesus
love me.

i know it is him.
im glad.
the hardest part is finding him...

3 comments:

Linsey said...

you made me cry, you little hussie. ;)

Katie said...

so you're saying i need to make a list first? ohhhh, that's why i've only found mostly assholes. i don't even have a list yet! :) so happy for you!

James Kernan Ferrin said...

what happens when you think you know, and the other one disagrees? then that's never good.